The 5000 Question Survey 2.0 (Questions 551-750)

16 December 2005 at 22:25 (General)

From The 5000 Question Survey 2.0. Questions 551-750

551. What is the most magical thing that has ever happened to you? I saw an aurora on a school camp once. That was pretty magical (then our science teacher explained it, but it was still reasonably “magical”.

552. How would you tell your friend his or her fly was open in public? I’d probably just quietly inform them that they were “sailing at half mast”

553. Does a good friend tell you you’ve got something in your teeth or pretend not to notice it? They tell, and then promptly leave me alone.

554. The world has many secrets. Have you learned any? Will you share it? a little off topic, I found your use of the word ‘learned’ a little uneasy so I looked it up in the dictionary (the American oxford)… anyway, looks like it is accepted American to use the term like that although I much prefer the British ‘learnt’. Anyway, I feel so put-off by the whole ordeal that… NO SECRETS FOR YOU!

555. Are there any bands you like so much that you want to get their music video collection on DVD? No, not really, music videos are good for a novelty, but I much prefer to listen to my music. There are some classic video hits out there but no single band produces enough stunning clips that I’d want to get there best of DVD. Bjork probably comes closest.

556. What do you need advice about? finance, amongst many other things

557. Have you been half-asleep and have you heard voices? yes and yes.

558. Do you have a good luck charm? no. My trusty pocket knife is probably the closet thing that I carry, but it’s currently missing in action.

559. Should animals have the same right to life as people? mostly, sort of, well actually, no.

560. What is your least favorite body part? tongues. But they have a cool feel and awesome sensation. Just anatomically they are the grossest.

561. Do you enjoy British comedy? Sometimes. Red Dwarf and Black Books are cool.

562. Are there ever happy endings or does nothing end? yes there are.

563. What is your worst trait? I don’t know, indecision? (pun not intended, lol!)

564. Is the world more beautiful because of love? most definitely and without question.

565. What is the essence of you? toto

566. What really inspires you? stories of young people achieving great things.

567. Have you met your soul mate? nope

568. Is everyday a special occasion? It should be.

569. What sound would you rather hear than any sound in the world? rainforest

570. Of the following which word best describes you:
natural: 2
outgoing: 1
polite: 3
quick thinking: 4

571. Do any commercials make you want to break your TV? I don’t watch much TV, and I watch even fewer ad breaks.

572. Have you ever lost your religion? no, I threw it away.

573. Do you want to share your life with someone? Not totally, but to some extent, yes I could see that working.

574. Where ARE the wild things? Congo

575. Would you rather have a child genetically related to you or an adopted child? I’m not picky

576. If I had a birthday party would you come? if you invited me I’d make an effort. I’d have every intention of coming however I’m notoriously bad at arriving at the right place and time.

577. What seemingly impossible thing is POSSIBLE? riding a unicycle while only touching the top of the fork and inside of the seat.

578. What song do you love to sing out loud? It’s a lovely day today

579. Have you ever run through the woods naked and played in a stream (you should)? no, yes.

580. Have you ever taken long solitary night walks? yes, very much so.

581. Is there more to you than anyone knows? than any single person knows: yes. But all out, I don’t think I have any secrets.

582. Can you make tonight the night that you do the things you always wanted to do? no, I really should get packing.

583. Would you rather watch life on TV or LIVE it? live it

584. What keeps you chained down? gravity. the law. society. the man.

585. What is the nagging feeling in the back of your head? I’m not sure. but as I read that my forehead become itchy.

586. Do you celebrate yourself? ummm… no.

587. Does everyone get the same opportunities in life? no (obviously. what about people born with serious abnormalities.

588. What would you consider to be better than sex? I don’t know. It’s like asking someone who hasn’t unicycled what they consider better than unicycling. It’s hard to grade something that you haven’t experienced.

589. What evil is necessary? taxes, superannuation, war

590. What’s your favorite one hit wonder? Violent Femmes – Blister in the Sun. Though it is quite annoying. I really don’t like one hit wonders.

591. What would you do anything for? peace and quiet once in a while.

592. Do you celebrate the full moon? sometimes. as in I celebrate it when I see it, I think “Yippie! lots of moon light to play in”. But I don’t get involved in any pagan dancing or watch the calendar or anything.

593. Have you ever gone in the water at the beach at night? absolutely.

594. Are you ordinary? in some ways.

595. What makes people want to hang out with you? I’m not too fussy and I try to be friendly i guess. I don’t know, who’s asking these dumb questions anyway?

596. Have you ever felt like you’ve been a little bit too good to someone? don’t think so. no

597. What book did you like that you had to read for school? like many people, the fact that we were reading it at school meant I didn’t like it. However, unlike most people I enjoyed the novel Empty World. I like those sorts of apocalypse/survival stories.

598. What book should everyone have to read in school? It should be left up to them. Though Animal Farm wouldn’t be a bad choice.

599. Do you like the store Old Navy? ?

600. What movie sequels do you like? Terminator 2.. ummm, yeah, that’s about it.

601. Do you have a lust for life? No, I don’t have a very strong sexual desire for life. (wtf)

602. Do you want to get more out of life? yes

603. Would you want to learn to:
Convert to Buddhism? no, though the Buddhist system interests me
Cure a hangover? no
Lie persuasively? no

604. What character from a movie is most like you? I wish I was more like Mark from Empire Records. he’s cool.

605. Are you comfortable with the idea of your own death? yes.

606. How do you feel about arranged marriages? I don’t know. It seems like an ugly idea, but then they can also be very successful in some cultures. If it’s the way it’s done in another culture and it’s not too damaging then I think we should leave them to work it out for themselves.

607. What do you hate that everyone else seems to like? I used to dislike Nick Cave. These days alcohol is probably the best example I can come up with. I went out a couple of weeks ago and the guys I was with insisted that I had something to drink. They purchased something for me and it was okay, but seriously, it’s just not necessary. As far as drinks go it doesn’t improve the flavour, as far as drugs go, it seems to have too little effect for too higher cost. I think if I had to choose a drug, I’d prefer to smoke dope than drink, the pot heads I know seem to enjoy themselves much more and they’re just… they’re never tense. But drugs are bad kids.

608. What do you like that others seem to hate? Cycling lots. Not doing drugs.

609. If you had to be named after a month, which month would you pick? If I was a lady: Summer (which isn’t a month), or June. June is a cool name. As I guy, if it was required, I’d go with December, but that would be weird.

610. Is time more like a highway or a meadow to you? highway

611. What is your favorite movie? fight club.

612. Which would you choose to be back in the day: a warrior, an alchemist, a minstrel, a bard, an oracle, a peasant, or a merchant? a warrior. everything else there seems kind of boring.

613. What is your favorite song lyric? we’ve already been there. Last time (#240) I said Pepper by the Butthole Surfers. This time I’m going for All Torn Down by The Living End:

I see the city and it isn’t what it used to be
A million houses goin’ up and down in front of me
No time to let the concrete set before it’s broken up again
Don’t care if it’s historic – don’t really care at all

614. What will you never run out of? that’s hard, we run out of time, tears, joy, laughs, anger, money, freedom, restrictions. I guess I’ll never run out of possibilities.

615. If you could force someone to fall madly in love with you, (anyone you choose) would you do it? no. it wouldn’t work. love needs respect and work. probably. regardless, no.

616. Have you ever seen the Disney movie The Black Cauldron? I think I may have seen a bit of it.

617. Have you ever read The Black Cauldron by Alexander Lloyd (or any of his other books in the Prydain Chronicles)? no

618. Have you ever written a paper the night before it was due? yes
How about the day it was due? no

619. Is there a movie you have watched so many times that you can quote it line for line? no, I used to be able to recite a fair bit of back to the future 2.

620. What is your favorite season? summer

621. Do you mind being described as cute? No, not any more.

622. What is the tackiest object in your home? probably my sombrero.

623. What do you think people are most ignorant towards? global politics/economics.

624. What is it that makes you an interesting person? My difference of opinion.

625. What makes other people interesting to you? sense of fun, different background.

626. How open to suggestion are you? very. At least I try to be.

627. Is Michael Jackson black or white? black

628. Are you often lonely? sometimes.

629. What’s the most unusual pet you’ve ever had? We had about 14 guinea pigs at one stage

630. Have you ever threatened an authority figure? yes. Though never on a large scale

631. If you had to choose would you rather make all your decisions henceforth with your head only or with your heart only? I’d rather choose with my head. keeps me out of trouble.

632. How imaginative are you? I think I’m very imaginative for my age.

633. Do you like the Counting Crows? never heard of them

634. If you took this survey from the diary (5000 Q Survey V2.0) did you note me so I could read it? no.

635. Are you more tense or laid back? laid back

636. Does your happiness depend on anyone else, or are you happy no matter what any one says or does? Without sounding too Zen-like; happiness is a state of mind. it is within.

637. What do you think of the idea of putting the bible into the format of a fashion magazine to attract the interest of teenagers? Those magazines are some of the most sicken propaganda i’ve ever seen (imho).

638. How often do you drink to get drunk? never

639. Would you consider yourself to be diplomatic? sometimes. not hugely and not often, but sometimes.

640. Do you think that most of the classes you have taken were taught in such a way as to make plain the relevance of the subject matter in your everyday life? no

641. Do you remember Crystal Pepsi? no

642. When was the last time you spent a night away from home? I slept at kent’s place after a You am I gig. 29/october

643. Some people say that there is no such thing as a stupid question. Is that true? yes. No one is born with any answers.

644. What is the most interesting TV channel? SBS

645. Name one song you could live without hearing ever again: that country pop song by steps, 5, 6, 7, 8.

646. Do your pets understand you when you talk? sit, come one, good dog, up on your beanbag/trampoline, lie down, roll over, git (get), out!, in the shed!, get the cat. sometimes Sparky even obeys.

647. What are three things you HAVE NOT done that might surprise people? I haven’t caught a fish, surfed ebay, uploaded a handmade webpage

648. Have you ever had a secret admirer? yes, I knew she liked me for a long time as well but never let her know (and she never acted upon it)

649. Have you been to a museum this year? no

650. Do you ever watch porn? no

651. Do you think that it would be a good idea if people served in the army, navy or air force for a while before they were allowed to vote? no. well, yes to a small degree, but otherwise overwhelmingly no. What I’m trying to say is: no.

652. If you were required to do this to vote, would you? yes

653. Do people often give you weird looks? no. people ignore me like everyone else unless I deserve a weird look.

654. Do like Japanese cooking? yes. and I love iron chef.

655. Do you care for stray animals? yes

656. Which animated movies have you seen and what did you think of them:
A Charlie Brown Christmas I don’t think I’ve seen this (but I liked charlie brown flicks)
A Garfield Halloween haven’t seen it
The Secret of Nimh haven’t seen it
The Last Unicorn haven’t seen it
The original Lord of the Rings cartoons haven’t seen them

657. Are you ambidextrous (equally good at using both hands)? not strictly so. But I play snooker with either hand.

658. Do you always say; “bless you” after someone sneezes, or do you hesitate? hesitate. and I say gesundheit (*I had no idea how to spell that and I had to ask my loving sister for the spelling thereof)

659. If you and your friends could go away for 2 days over Halloween weekend where would you go? yeah, because we celebrate halloween. Anywhere out of Adelaide.

660. Which of these animated movies have you seen and what did you think of them:
Watership Down haven’t seen
As the Wind Blows haven’t seen
Grave of the Fireflies haven’t seen
How the Grinch Stole Christmas haven’t seen
Spirited Away haven’t seen

661. Do you feel that society is male dominated, female dominated, or neutral? male dominated

662. What words offend you? nothing offends me however I’d prefer if people didn’t use racial slurs or blasphemer

663. They’re just words. Can you get over it? wow, after 662 other questions this was the biggest surprise. I didn’t see that coming. But I’d say I’m well and truly over it.

664. Have you ever looked into different religions? yes.

665. Which ones have you looked into? I was a Christian, I’ve looked into various denominations there. I’ve also ‘hung out’ with some pagans and listened to conversation about pagan practices at nauseam. I much prefer Buddhism from what I’ve read and heard.

666. What do you think of Satanism as a religion? yes. it is probably most misunderstood. I don’t know. I don’t know any Satanists any more, the last one I met was pretty messed up but he would have been messed up regardless of religion. He did too many drugs and wasn’t a nice person. He was kind of scary as well, but I’m sure there are some nice Satanists out there (from what I know of the religion which is very little)

667. Do you like it better when your classes are taught sitting in rows or sitting in a circle? rows

668. Have you ever read your own tarot cards? no

669. Which ones do you like better, the three old star wars movies or the 2 new ones? hehehe, there are 3 new ones. I haven’t seen all of the old ones or new ones, but I prefer the old ones (Jar-jar binks is the most annoying creation ever)

670. If you scream in outer space does it make a sound? Sort of, well no. sound is the vibration of particles, in space there is ~1 atom per square metre (or so I’ve been told)… therefore if you were to scream (or more realistically get a speaker) and create vibrations you could technically get that one atom to vibrate which is technically sound. But for all intensive purposes: no.

671. If you saw The Queen of the Damned did you want to be a vampire/Goth afterwards? I haven’t seen it. But no I wouldn’t (goths are such fashion victims/fad followers).

672. If you saw SLC Punk did you want to be punk afterwards? probably :( lol

673. What is your favorite zombie movie? that Australian one… Undead

674. Best kids birthday party: ceramics, chuck-e-cheese, roller rink, bowling, sleep over, movie theater roller rink. (and as if you need to be a kid)

675. What were your parties like when you were a kid? non-existant. I had a sleep over when I was 7.

676. Best teen (about 15-16) birthday party: ceramics, chuck-e-cheese, roller rink, bowling, sleep over, movie theater, house party, catered in a hall, restaurant, family trip, concert house party

677. What are/were your 15-16 year old parties like? non-existant

678. Best 18th birthday party: ceramics, chuck-e-cheese, roller rink, bowling, sleep over, movie theater, house party, catered in a hall, restaurant, family trip, concert, club, pool hall, college party house party

679. If you are 18 what was your party like? non-existant

680. Best 21st birthday party: ceramics, chuck-e-cheese, roller rink, bowling, sleep over, movie theater, house party, catered in a hall, restaurant, family trip, concert, club, pool hall, college party, bar, Atlantic city/Las Vegas trip house party

681. If you saw The Craft were you interested in wicca/paganism/magic afterwards? haven’t seen it, but no.

682. What are your top 3 priorities? to pack my gear, to move house, to organise my financial record for work.

683. If you saw fight club did you want to get into a fistfight afterwards? Yes I’ve seen it. No I don’t and that wasn’t the point of the movie.

684. What is your favorite smell? original Rexona for men (?).

685. Give everything below a humor rating (1 = laugh your ass off, 2 = lol, 3 = smile, 4 = lame, 5 = not funny, 6 = offensive):
*by offensive I don’t mean I’m offended I just don’t find it amusing that someone can make fun out of something so wrong.
People falling 1-4
Rape jokes 6
Sarcastic comments 3-4
Blonde jokes 1-3
Dirty jokes 3-6
God/religion jokes 3-6
Long-ass jokes 1-5
Death jokes 1-4
Pain/sickness jokes 1-6
Animals doing cute stuff 3-5
Bodily functions 4-5
Knock jokes 4
Ethnic jokes 3-6
Puns 2-5
Ironic situations 2-5

685. If you saw Cruel Intentions did you want to have lots of meaningless sex afterwards? haven’t seen it

686. Do you get at least three hugs per day? no.

687. What should someone never say to you/call you if they want to remain on your good side? don’t talk down to me.

688. If you saw Trainspotting did you want to do drugs afterwards? haven’t seen it

689. Do movies have a great influence on you? no

690. Do you have a favorite reality TV show? 30 days

691. Are there certain roles that people are pressured to play in society or can they basically do whatever they want? people are pressured, but that doesn’t mean they can’t do whatever they like.

692. How does the 2004 Dawn of the Dead remake compare to the original movie? I haven’t seen either

693. Have you ever held a magnifying glass over an insect to burn it? yes. lots of ants. I’m a cruel bastard

694. Have you ever pulled the wings off a fly, butterfly or any other insect? no

695. What would you think of a guy (if you’re into guys) or a girl (if you’re into girls) who wanted to take you to the park to feed the birds and look at the turtles and fish in the water on a date? yeah, that cool.

696. Do you use public pools? yes. no often

697. Do you use public bathrooms? yes

698. Do you use public showers? yes (well I use the ones at uni)

699. How old will you be in 17 years? 37

700. Would it effect you at all if you knew that a very large meteor was headed towards earth that would impact in 17 years? no

701. What is your favorite mixed drink? multi-V

702. When answering these questions are you often pulled in different directions, as if committing to one answer eliminates the possibility for all others? no, I just answer with a statement that is correct most of the time (most of the time).

703. Chicken Mesala, Pasta Primavera, Veal Cutlet Parmesan or Linguini with Clam Sauce?
Pasta anything.

704. If you were alone in your friend’s house/room/apartment would you look in their drawers and notebooks?
no

705. What would you really like to do but you don’t because you are afraid of getting caught?
riding in places like the mall (it’s an outdoor mall). and I’m not afraid of the cops in this situation, it’s just I don’t want to get caught by bike hater who are going to think less of cyclists because I’m busy breaking the rules (even though it’s a stupid rule).

706. Of the following, which word best describes you:
responsible: 4
spontaneous: 3
tactful: 2
uninhbited: 1

707. Which band would you most likely check out?
The Smiths (indi-pop 80’s-90’s) yeah
The Lords of Acid (acid/house/dance 90’s) no idea
Front 242 (80’s-90’s industrial/dance) no idea

708. How can one put an end to procrastination, as a bad habit? wait for the deadline to hit you like a brick. or just go somewhere where there is nothing else to do.

709. What feature would you want on your car that is not currently offered? flying. or at least a better stereo.

710. What kind of poetry speaks to you? song

711. What is your favorite store that is open 24 hours? The 24/7 near the western end of the mall (it’s either that or maccas or a servo hey?)

712. Do you find that sleep is just so much sleepier when you are supposed to be doing something else? yes.

713. Do you also find that the books you chose are so much more luscious when you have a stack of actual assignments that you Should be reading? yes

714. If you have had the chance to compare the original 5000 Question Survey to this edited version, what is your opinion? sorry I have not seen version 1

715. What’s the most creative answer you can think of for ‘what is black and white and red all over’? The White Stripes

716. Why do people slow down on the highway when they pass a cop car pulling someone else over? to get a good look before the good laugh

717. Are they afraid that the cop will STOP pulling over whoever he is pulling over and pull them over instead? most likely no. well maybe. maybe it’s a reflex for some to hit the breaks when they see a cop car.

718. It’s daddy’s birthday. What do you get him? I got him a parker pen last year. He loved it.

719. What’s your 5,000 question survey nickname?
Look at the word next to the 2nd letter of your first name
A anything but
*
B bubalicious
C captivating
D deadly
E erotic
F funky
G greasy
H heaps of
I indie
J jelly
K kinetic
L lasher
M Mr. (or Mrs.)
N neglected
O ogre-like
P parading
Q quacking
R Rico
S stinky
T the one and only
U uber
V Velcro
W wishing for
X x-tra
Y yearning for
Z zoobalee

Now take the first letter of your last name.
A aardvarks
B baboo
C creme pie
D drag queen
E eggbert
F flex
G god
H hell
I Isabelle
J juice
K kisses
L lightning
M mannish boys
N nice
O octopi
P porcupines
Q q-bert
R rainbows
S suave
*
T tushy
U underwear
V valor
W weenie
X xtc
Y yohimbe
Z zipper
Put the two words together for your nickname.

anything but suave

720. You know that shaky feeling that you get when it’s all coming to a climax, and everyone involved is breaking into the good kind of cold sweat, working as individuals and at the same time as a single force of energy, and it all meshes together, and for a brief moment, you’re holding your breath and tingling all over, and after it’s done you’re on an explosive and dizzying high for the rest of the night?
What does that feeling come from?
winning theatre sports

721. How many of your teachers can you imagine drinking or doing drugs on the weekends? about half. maybe more. actually yes, I can imagine nearly all of them getting sloshed.

722. Do you like Alice in Wonderland or Through the Looking Glass? I love it

723. Write a question and answer it here. Edit: crap, I can’t believe I forgot to come back to this. I was hoping you would ask this earlier today but when I got to it I couldn’t remember my answer so I left it thinking I’d be able to get back to it. Reading kent’s comment I remembered. Anyway, I wanted to ask something about childhood thinking like: When you were a child (like 6 or 7) did you understand the relationship between your parents and grandparents? I did from an early age but I’m not sure how or why I knew this.

724. Who is your favorite playwright? hmm. I think the last production I saw (and it’s been a while) was Beowulf performed by a single New Zealander (I think). Anyway, it was pretty good. but I don’t really have a favourite playwright and Beowulf wasn’t really written by any individual as far as we know.

725. What movie has come out recently that you couldn’t have less interest in? many movies. more specifically: Mean Girls

726. What would the worst movie ever be about? American crap. with Hugh Grant

727. Do you like truffles? indifferent
Do you like Turkish delight? yes. either kind

728. Can you tell the difference between a transvestite and a real woman? no. especially in gay bars.

729. What’s funnier, plants or fire extinguishers? plants, but not by much

730. For question 720 did you write down sex?
You pervert, I was thinking of musical theater. yeah yeah. very clever.

731. Which is better, leopard print or plaid? plaid. When I saw one of my lab demonstrators on the bus the other day he was wearing a kilt and matching plaid tie

732. What would you consider ordinary? white A4 paper and commodores

733. What is out of the ordinary? gold leaf and unicycles

734. Do you ever watch COPS? yes.

735. Is there always room for j – e – l – l – o? Yes, there is always room for j – e – l – l – y

736. If you had your own TV show, what kind of show would you make it? unicycling

737. Do you know how heavy things like airplanes stay in the air? enslaved fairies

738. When do you act the most dramatic? ummm I don’t think I do. Do I act dramatically anyone?

739. Are you one of those people who have, “see photo id,” written on the back of their credit cards? no. we actually check signatures in Australia. I’ve never heard of that being used to prevent fraud.

740. It’s mom’s birthday. What do you get her? flowers, chocolates, slippers, a massage.

741. What celebrity has pretty much disappeared leaving you wondering ‘where are they now’? Hanson. But you see them every now and again. I think they’re doing all right in the states. record companies really do control the teen market.

742. Would you get angry if you and your girl/boyfriend saw the preview for a movie and talked about seeing it together and then they saw it with one of their friends while you were busy? no

743. How many people do you think will finish this whooooooole survey? many people who’ve got up to #743 will, but only if the survey has finished being written before they get to the end.

744. Have you ever written a message, sealed it in a bottle and thrown it into a river/lake ocean? yes

745. If you haven’t would you want to? NA

746. If you ever did what would you write? “G’day. hope thing are doing alright.” or something like that

747. What do you wish you could always be protected from? getting hit by cars

748. What small thing annoys you so much it should be a crime? people not finishing sentences.

749. Would you rather watch a video of fish in a tank, or the Yule log on TV? The Yule thingo.. (?)

750. Is it better to be loved or feared? love and be loved

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7 Comments

  1. Kent said,

    551. What is the most magical thing that has ever happened to you? Sleeping steadily for eight hours, then waking up five minutes before my alarm goes off.

    552. How would you tell your friend his or her fly was open in public? I’d say, “Yer, uh, fly is open.” Have I said before that I forgot to do up my fly at my Year 12 formal? Nobody told me then, bastards.

    553. Does a good friend tell you you’ve got something in your teeth or pretend not to notice it? They tell. A good friend wouldn’t take offence if I said the same to then. But I wouldn’t, because I wouldn’t even notice it.

    554. The world has many secrets. Have you learned any? Will you share it? The world has many and I’ve spent the last god knows how many years at school and uni learning them. If you mean life, then yes, there’s many there too, and no, I won’t share any, you have to learn them yourself.

    555. Are there any bands you like so much that you want to get their music video collection on DVD? *points to You Am I DVD in bookshelf*

    556. What do you need advice about? How to make our work monkeys not slack off!

    557. Have you been half-asleep and have you heard voices? Nope.

    558. Do you have a good luck charm? Nope.

    559. Should animals have the same right to life as people? Perhaps. I’m putting off the decision because I’m lazy and unprincipled.

    560. What is your least favorite body part? The gastrointestinal system, if that counts as a part.

    561. Do you enjoy British comedy? There are few other kinds of comedy that count as funny. *glares at the Comedy Channel, who need to realise this fact*

    562. Are there ever happy endings or does nothing end? Oh, things surely end. Go visit a cemetery. And yes there’re happy ones.

    563. What is your worst trait? The whole losing-of-the-temper thing.

    564. Is the world more beautiful because of love? Aye.

    565. What is the essence of you? Water, because I can’t think of a heart-rendingly honest answer.

    566. What really inspires you? Nothing you’ll see on a current affairs show, that’s for damn sure. Actually, not much at all.

    567. Have you met your soul mate? Perhaps. How am I supposed to know the answer to that, eh?

    568. Is everyday a special occasion? Well that seems like a contradiction in terms, so, no.

    569. What sound would you rather hear than any sound in the world? The sound of a moderate breeze never fails to make me want to be in it.

    570. Of the following which word best describes you:
    natural: 3
    outgoing: 4
    polite: 1
    quick thinking: 2

    571. Do any commercials make you want to break your TV? Depends what show I’m watching. If it’s news or A Current Affair, they’re a welcome relief. Otherwise, violence may ensue, yes.

    572. Have you ever lost your religion? Nope. That song is beginning to get annoying.

    573. Do you want to share your life with someone? Yes, but it’s a prospect fraught with terribly frightening challenges.

    574. Where ARE the wild things? In that book. Sigh. What a great book.

    575. Would you rather have a child genetically related to you or an adopted child? A relation, absolutely.

    576. If I had a birthday party would you come? No. You aren’t my friend.

    577. What seemingly impossible thing is POSSIBLE? Facing that aisle in half an hour. Yes you CAN do it.

    578. What song do you love to sing out loud? None. Unless I’m alone, in which case, many.

    579. Have you ever run through the woods naked and played in a stream (you should)? No and not really, unless falling in while crossing and then not immediately getting out counts.

    580. Have you ever taken long solitary night walks? Oddly enough, only once.

    581. Is there more to you than anyone knows? Yes, but what’s left isn’t worth knowing.

    582. Can you make tonight the night that you do the things you always wanted to do? Maybe, I’ll be doing fun stuff tonight.

    583. Would you rather watch life on TV or LIVE it? Both.

    584. What keeps you chained down? Yeah, gravity. And at the moment, thanks to all you bloody idiots’ Christmas-lets-go-out-and-spend-fuckloads-of-money-on-food-cheer, utter exhaustion.

    585. What is the nagging feeling in the back of your head? Non-existent.

    586. Do you celebrate yourself? Very very occasionally.

    587. Does everyone get the same opportunities in life? No.

    588. What would you consider to be better than sex? I second Matty, that’s a silly question to ask virgins.

    589. What evil is necessary? Work.

    590. What’s your favorite one hit wonder? It’s not a one hit wonder, but for some reason the almighty Fat Cop springs to mind.

    591. What would you do anything for? Nothing. Oh, you meant figuratively. An extra thousand dollars a week on our budget at work.

    592. Do you celebrate the full moon? Yes, because it makes driving and walking in the night-time more fun. You can see the shadows of clouds on the ground.

    593. Have you ever gone in the water at the beach at night? Only up to my knees.

    594. Are you ordinary? Nope!

    595. What makes people want to hang out with you? An excellent question. You should ask them.

    596. Have you ever felt like you’ve been a little bit too good to someone? You can never be too good, but you can be too friendly to some people.

    597. What book did you like that you had to read for school? I liked most of them, but I absolutely love the songs of Cabaret the film to death now, and for some reason Gatsby keeps coming back into my head. I think I tend to love books more the more I study them.

    598. What book should everyone have to read in school? The bloody dictionary. Start early and keep the bloody hell at it.

    599. Do you like the store Old Navy?

    600. What movie sequels do you like? Can’t think of any, but isn’t it interesting how TV spin-offs from movies are so often much better than the movie? Stargate springs to mind, and though I haven’t seen the film, from all I’ve heard, Buffy is another.

    601. Do you have a lust for life? Occasionally.

    602. Do you want to get more out of life? Yes, but don’t rush it.

    603. Would you want to learn to:
    Convert to Buddhism? Nope. Boring.
    Cure a hangover? It would be useful knowledge. Experience tells me that water is the key.
    Lie persuasively? T’would be handy.

    604. What character from a movie is most like you? Oh, I don’t know. Don’t you think film is less about empathy and more about envisioning people you want to be like – or with?

    605. Are you comfortable with the idea of your own death? No, it scares the shit out of me. No sarcasm.

    606. How do you feel about arranged marriages? Dirty. It’s wrong.

    607. What do you hate that everyone else seems to like? Depends what crowd everyone else is in. I was going to say “cars”, but then this is Matty’s blog and that would seem incongruous. I hate mushrooms. Everybody else can’t seem to get enough of em.

    608. What do you like that others seem to hate? Reading otherwise boring history books. I should find some people who like doing that too.

    609. If you had to be named after a month, which month would you pick? March. “Hey March” – I could turn around and start goose-stepping. Heh.

    610. Is time more like a highway or a meadow to you? Highway.

    611. What is your favorite movie? Amelie.

    612. Which would you choose to be back in the day: a warrior, an alchemist, a minstrel, a bard, an oracle, a peasant, or a merchant? Depends what day, duh-brain. Though I’d probably pick oracle every time.

    613. What is your favorite song lyric? Tuesday, You Am I:
    Saw the sun come up again
    Last week’s papers and a pack of darts that got me through till ten
    The 10:15’s five minutes late
    I really should just get up one of these days
    Next door is coughing up his lungs
    Two am I’m sure she said
    She was gonna get herself a gun
    I blacked out from three to five
    You should hear what’s going on outside

    614. What will you never run out of? Breath. When I do, there won’t be a me to run out of anything.

    615. If you could force someone to fall madly in love with you, (anyone you choose) would you do it? No need for force, merely encouragement. And as for that, of course: encouragement would be acts of love and friendship towards them, and if you love them, of course you’ll do that.

    616. Have you ever seen the Disney movie The Black Cauldron? Nope

    617. Have you ever read The Black Cauldron by Alexander Lloyd (or any of his other books in the Prydain Chronicles)? No.

    618. Have you ever written a paper the night before it was due? Aye.
    How about the day it was due? Yep.

    619. Is there a movie you have watched so many times that you can quote it line for line? Apollo 13. Though I’ve probably forgotten most of it by now.

    620. What is your favorite season? In summer, winter. In winter, summer. In reality (i.e. when it’s so good that I don’t notice it): spring and autumn.

    621. Do you mind being described as cute? Nope, but then barely anyone does.

    622. What is the tackiest object in your home? My parents aren’t very tacky. And neither am I. Oh we the tasteful folk.

    623. What do you think people are most ignorant towards? Other people’s hearts.

    624. What is it that makes you an interesting person? Search me. This is an oddly relevant question!

    625. What makes other people interesting to you? Their laughs.

    626. How open to suggestion are you? Virtually closed to strangers. Open to friends.

    627. Is Michael Jackson black or white? Sort of beige.

    628. Are you often lonely? Not any longer.

    629. What’s the most unusual pet you’ve ever had? Nothing very odd.

    630. Have you ever threatened an authority figure? No, but I had great fun in year 12 ignoring most of what they tried to tell me.

    631. If you had to choose would you rather make all your decisions henceforth with your head only or with your heart only? What an incredibly difficult question. I’d like to exercise the option of sending this question to detention. I’m finding a judicious mix of heart and mind can reap handsome rewards.

    632. How imaginative are you? Not a great deal

    633. Do you like the Counting Crows? Hell no.

    634. If you took this survey from the diary (5000 Q Survey V2.0) did you note me so I could read it? No.

    635. Are you more tense or laid back? Depends. Tense.

    636. Does your happiness depend on anyone else, or are you happy no matter what any one says or does? It depends on other people and circumstances, along with a sizeable dose of Matty’s “within”.

    637. What do you think of the idea of putting the bible into the format of a fashion magazine to attract the interest of teenagers? Haha, it’d be great. I’d love to know what brand of vibrating condom God endorses.

    638. How often do you drink to get drunk? Never, yet.

    639. Would you consider yourself to be diplomatic? Yes, and no. God I hate answering questions that way.

    640. Do you think that most of the classes you have taken were taught in such a way as to make plain the relevance of the subject matter in your everyday life? No, but then why does everything have to be relevant to everyday life, eh?

    641. Do you remember Crystal Pepsi? No. Judging by the complete lack of people who are buying Pepsi Samba at the moment, I confidently predict no-one will remember it either.

    642. When was the last time you spent a night away from home? Does it count if I’m still at work when the sun comes up? Nah, I don’t know, a long while. Or not so long: when I was in Canberra. September.

    643. Some people say that there is no such thing as a stupid question. Is that true? No. There are incredibly stupid questions, and people ask them all the bloody time.

    644. What is the most interesting TV channel? Well, I know the right answer is SBS, and the respectable answer is ABC (and with that old Thursday night line-up, it’d be damn true), and the realistic answer is Ten because they show the Simpsons a lot, and that’s a funny show, but (phew take a breath) these days I’m not home to watch any TV and I only watch things that have no relevance to TV channels at all, like films and shows on DVD, so, …

    645. Name one song you could live without hearing ever again: I can’t quite put a finger on it, but you’ve made some crucial mistake with the syntax of your question. Uh, the Jessica Simpson “These Boots Are Made For Walkin'” song. God, she needs to be silenced, and fast.

    646. Do your pets understand you when you talk? The budgies do. They frantically leap to the other side of the cage, which is an appropriate response, since I’m always trying to scare the living daylights out of them.

    647. What are three things you HAVE NOT done that might surprise people? Listened to more than one Nick Cave album, changed a tyre by myself, successfully done a “Dead Man’s Float” in the swimming pool or the sea.

    648. Have you ever had a secret admirer? Yep.

    649. Have you been to a museum this year? Nope.

    650. Do you ever watch porn? No, you’d have to be really desperate to get porn from the video shop, and the only video I’ve ever bothered downloading over the net was watching Nick Berg getting his head sawn off. That doesn’t really count as porn.

    651. Do you think that it would be a good idea if people served in the army, navy or air force for a while before they were allowed to vote? It would be a travesty, but whatever. I feel kinda disenfranchised about my vote for the oddest reason: I voted for Labor, and Labor won my seat off the Liberals by a fairly narrow margin. My vote counted, for a lot; but overall, the Liberals got in, with big majorities, and are now introducing the shit that I didn’t want them to. Great work, Mr. Vote, great frickin’ work.

    652. If you were required to do this to vote, would you? Nah, see above answer. Fuck it. I’d rather not have a say than be trained to be a professional killer.

    653. Do people often give you weird looks? Yes, all the bloody time. Look somewhere else, goddamn you all!

    654. Do like Japanese cooking? Sushi is good, but I’m not familiar with any other dishes.

    655. Do you care for stray animals? No, I leave the injured sparrows to wander around the backyard. I get really worried, but there’s nothing I can do for them.

    656. Which animated movies have you seen and what did you think of them: Haven’t seen any.
    A Charlie Brown Christmas
    A Garfield Halloween
    The Secret of Nimh
    The Last Unicorn
    The original Lord of the Rings cartoons

    657. Are you ambidextrous (equally good at using both hands)? No. I can fill and face with both though.

    658. Do you always say; “bless you” after someone sneezes, or do you hesitate? I split my reactions evenly.

    659. If you and your friends could go away for 2 days over Halloween weekend where would you go? I’d let them choose. As long as it wasn’t the Gold Coast, which it wouldn’t be, so that’s okay.

    660. Which of these animated movies have you seen and what did you think of them: Haven’t seen any. I’m not big on animated films.
    Watership Down
    As the Wind Blows
    Grave of the Fireflies
    How the Grinch Stole Christmas
    Spirited Away

    661. Do you feel that society is male dominated, female dominated, or neutral? Male dominated.

    662. What words offend you? I hadn’t come across racial slurs like “coons” – in real life -until recently, and I don’t much like it (to my mild surprise).

    663. They’re just words. Can you get over it? Oh, I do, it’s not like I staked him in the heart.

    664. Have you ever looked into different religions? Not since year 11.

    665. Which ones have you looked into? Well, first I tried to do the whole Christian thing (ages ago) (heh) and that was a bit of a laugh (heh x2). I think I meddled with Buddhism for a few weeks in year 11, but then I realised it was a load of shit, abandoned my arrogant preconceptions about religion, and proceeded to taunt Mrs Eichner with stupid questions. No wait, that was year 9.

    666. What do you think of Satanism as a religion? I think they’re sadly in need of much love. Evil is to do with bad things and bad things aren’t to do with love and happiness and flowers and love and happiness and flowers (if you don’t like flowers you deserve to be burnt at the stake, sorry guys) are good things on any moral axis worth considering. Good things are good by definition, people! Bad things are bad. By definition, Satan associates with bad things – he is, by definition, evil. You can’t like bad things, people (for the last bloody time, by definition). Yer all twisted and deluded.

    667. Do you like it better when your classes are taught sitting in rows or sitting in a circle? Rows. Aren’t we all just the little proto-authoritarians, eh?

    668. Have you ever read your own tarot cards? Yes! I totally helped P. with the reading. But she dealt them, so that doesn’t really count. Heh.

    669. Which ones do you like better, the three old star wars movies or the 2 new ones? I second Jar-Jar Binks as a test case for the re-introduction of judicial murder in Australia, even if it’s only for screen characters. The old trilogy (and not the bloody remastered versions) rules.

    670. If you scream in outer space does it make a sound? [For all intents and purposes,] no.

    671. If you saw The Queen of the Damned did you want to be a vampire/Goth afterwards? Yeah, totally. But Buffy is way better vampire fiction.

    672. If you saw SLC Punk did you want to be punk afterwards? Don’t know what it is.

    673. What is your favorite zombie movie? Haven’t seen any. But that Buffy episode with the zombie-gathering mask is kinda cool. Especially when Buffy sticks the thingy into… yeah, I’ll try not to spoil the end for anyone.

    674. Best kids birthday party: ceramics, chuck-e-cheese, roller rink, bowling, sleep over, movie theater. Movie theatre.

    675. What were your parties like when you were a kid? I only remember one. Can’t remember how I felt about it.

    676. Best teen (about 15-16) birthday party: ceramics, chuck-e-cheese, roller rink, bowling, sleep over, movie theater, house party, catered in a hall, restaurant, family trip, concert. House party.

    677. What are/were your 15-16 year old parties like? Never had one.

    678. Best 18th birthday party: ceramics, chuck-e-cheese, roller rink, bowling, sleep over, movie theater, house party, catered in a hall, restaurant, family trip, concert, club, pool hall, college party: Resturant.

    679. If you are 18 what was your party like? I’d rather have not had it. (Was at a resturant).

    680. Best 21st birthday party: ceramics, chuck-e-cheese, roller rink, bowling, sleep over, movie theater, house party, catered in a hall, restaurant, family trip, concert, club, pool hall, college party, bar, Atlantic city/Las Vegas trip: Resturant. (Oh I can see you aren’t going to ask me how my 21st was, but since it was only the other week I can report it was at a resturant, and it was nice.)

    681. If you saw The Craft were you interested in wicca/paganism/magic afterwards? Haven’t seen it.

    682. What are your top 3 priorities? To get work running properly, to, uh, pass uni?, and to think of a third priority.

    683. If you saw fight club did you want to get into a fistfight afterwards? No. Whatever you people say, that film glamourizes fistfights and that’s a bad things (like flowers are a good thing).

    684. What is your favorite smell? Varies from time to time, but fresh air with whatever gas it is that lightning generates in small quantities (something with nitrogren in it, as I recall, bloody year 12 chemistry) is kind of good.

    685. Give everything below a humor rating (1 = laugh your ass off, 2 = lol, 3 = smile, 4 = lame, 5 = not funny, 6 = offensive):
    *by offensive I don’t mean I’m offended I just don’t find it amusing that someone can make fun out of something so wrong.
    People falling 3
    Rape jokes 6
    Sarcastic comments 3-5
    Blonde jokes 3-5
    Dirty jokes 3-5
    God/religion jokes 2
    Long-ass jokes (what is a long-ass joke?)
    Death jokes 2
    Pain/sickness jokes 3
    Animals doing cute stuff 2-3
    Bodily functions 3-5
    Knock jokes 3-5
    Ethnic jokes 3-6
    Puns 2
    Ironic situations 3-5

    685. If you saw Cruel Intentions did you want to have lots of meaningless sex afterwards? Totally. That’s such an 80s film.

    686. Do you get at least three hugs per day? Nope.

    687. What should someone never say to you/call you if they want to remain on your good side? Probably not much they could say. Everyone who is on my good side is on there for who they are, not what they say.

    688. If you saw Trainspotting did you want to do drugs afterwards? Naturally. After seeing that drugs basically ruin your life and lead you to accidentally kill your own children, they just have this wonderfully attractive question. Of course bloody well not. That film made me realise that there is nothing good about heroin at all.

    689. Do movies have a great influence on you? Yeah.

    690. Do you have a favorite reality TV show? BB.

    691. Are there certain roles that people are pressured to play in society or can they basically do whatever they want? Pressure. Lots of pressure. But people almost always choose to take it on themselves, whether consciously or not. Even then, there’s pressure on people who choose to forgoe it to conform to all the other pressure-inducing folk. Did that make sense?

    692. How does the 2004 Dawn of the Dead remake compare to the original movie? Haven’t seen them.

    693. Have you ever held a magnifying glass over an insect to burn it? Nope.

    694. Have you ever pulled the wings off a fly, butterfly or any other insect? Nope.

    695. What would you think of a guy (if you’re into guys) or a girl (if you’re into girls) who wanted to take you to the park to feed the birds and look at the turtles and fish in the water on a date? Great! Let’s go!

    696. Do you use public pools? Yes, but these days I’d just go to the beach.

    697. Do you use public bathrooms? Yes, but not urinals.

    698. Do you use public showers? Only in caravan parks.

    699. How old will you be in 17 years? 38. Fuck!

    700. Would it effect you at all if you knew that a very large meteor was headed towards earth that would impact in 17 years? It might affect me. But it wouldn’t effect me. Two words! One’s a noun and one’s a verb! Easy!

    701. What is your favorite mixed drink? A spider.

    702. When answering these questions are you often pulled in different directions, as if committing to one answer eliminates the possibility for all others? Yeah.

    703. Chicken Mesala, Pasta Primavera, Veal Cutlet Parmesan or Linguini with Clam Sauce? Veal cutlet with parmesan.

    704. If you were alone in your friend’s house/room/apartment would you look in their drawers and notebooks? No, but I’d probably be tempted. My will is good, but if it gets into collusion with my heart, watch out.

    705. What would you really like to do but you don’t because you are afraid of getting caught? Break various road rules. Sometimes I do, but not often.

    706. Of the following, which word best describes you:
    responsible: 1
    spontaneous: 3
    tactful: 2
    uninhbited: 4

    707. Which band would you most likely check out?
    The Smiths (indi-pop 80’s-90’s) They’re okay.
    The Lords of Acid (acid/house/dance 90’s) Very nope.
    Front 242 (80’s-90’s industrial/dance) Very half-very-again nope.

    708. How can one put an end to procrastination, as a bad habit? Hah, let me know when you find out the answer.

    709. What feature would you want on your car that is not currently offered? A working tape player.

    710. What kind of poetry speaks to you? The rhyming kind, or the sung kind.

    711. What is your favorite store that is open 24 hours? The service station. I wish there were a 24 hour supermarket nearby. Thank god mine isn’t one!

    712. Do you find that sleep is just so much sleepier when you are supposed to be doing something else? No.

    713. Do you also find that the books you chose are so much more luscious when you have a stack of actual assignments that you should be reading? Not really.

    714. If you have had the chance to compare the original 5000 Question Survey to this edited version, what is your opinion? It’s much better.

    715. What’s the most creative answer you can think of for ‘what is black and white and red all over’? Nothing creative. Sorry.

    716. Why do people slow down on the highway when they pass a cop car pulling someone else over? To see what’s going on!

    717. Are they afraid that the cop will STOP pulling over whoever he is pulling over and pull them over instead? Some, perhaps. You need to get off your generalisation high.

    718. It’s daddy’s birthday. What do you get him? A card.

    719. What’s your 5,000 question survey nickname?
    Look at the word next to the 2nd letter of your first name
    A anything but
    B bubalicious
    C captivating
    D deadly
    E erotic *
    F funky
    G greasy
    H heaps of
    I indie
    J jelly
    K kinetic
    L lasher
    M Mr. (or Mrs.)
    N neglected
    O ogre-like
    P parading
    Q quacking
    R Rico
    S stinky
    T the one and only
    U uber
    V Velcro
    W wishing for
    X x-tra
    Y yearning for
    Z zoobalee

    Now take the first letter of your last name.
    A aardvarks
    B baboo
    C creme pie
    D drag queen
    E eggbert
    F flex
    G god
    H hell
    I Isabelle *
    J juice
    K kisses
    L lightning
    M mannish boys
    N nice
    O octopi
    P porcupines
    Q q-bert
    R rainbows
    S suave
    T tushy
    U underwear
    V valor
    W weenie
    X xtc
    Y yohimbe
    Z zipper
    Put the two words together for your nickname: erotic Isabelle. Nah, sorry, doesn’t fit.

    720. You know that shaky feeling that you get when it’s all coming to a climax, and everyone involved is breaking into the good kind of cold sweat, working as individuals and at the same time as a single force of energy, and it all meshes together, and for a brief moment, you’re holding your breath and tingling all over, and after it’s done you’re on an explosive and dizzying high for the rest of the night? Yeah.
    What does that feeling come from? Heh.

    721. How many of your teachers can you imagine drinking or doing drugs on the weekends? Ooh can I replace ‘teachers’ with ‘management’?? Heh again.

    722. Do you like Alice in Wonderland or Through the Looking Glass? Nope, Lewis Carroll drives me mad.

    723. Write a question and answer it here. What’s the capital of Chad? N’Djamena!

    724. Who is your favorite playwright? I don’t have one, I don’t know many plays.

    725. What movie has come out recently that you couldn’t have less interest in? Yikes, um, most of them? Whatever ones I haven’t heard about.

    726. What would the worst movie ever be about? It would be another Star Trek film. Nah, that’s a bit harsh.

    727. Do you like truffles? Hrmm, I don’t actually know what a truffle is.
    Do you like Turkish delight? It’s okay.

    728. Can you tell the difference between a transvestite and a real woman? I haven’t encountered many, but those I have were obvious. Anyway, if I couldn’t tell the difference then they’d just be ordinary women to my eyes and I wouldn’t notice them as transvestites, and thus this question is rather flawed unless you’re a professional transvestite inspector, isn’t it?

    729. What’s funnier, plants or fire extinguishers? Fire extinguishers.

    730. For question 720 did you write down sex? I kept my answer to myself, but sex did cross my mind – not that I’d know.

    731. Which is better, leopard print or plaid? Plaid.

    732. What would you consider ordinary? A trolley.

    733. What is out of the ordinary? A trolley without wheels.

    734. Do you ever watch COPS? Once.

    735. Is there always room for j – e – l – l – o? I second Matty’s answer.

    736. If you had your own TV show, what kind of show would you make it? Why Supermarket Customers Should ___.

    737. Do you know how heavy things like airplanes stay in the air? Yes.

    738. When do you act the most dramatic? When I’m really pissed. (off).

    739. Are you one of those people who have, “see photo id,” written on the back of their credit cards? No.

    740. It’s mom’s birthday. What do you get her? A card and perhaps flowers or rocky road.

    741. What celebrity has pretty much disappeared leaving you wondering ‘where are they now’? Can’t think of any.

    742. Would you get angry if you and your girl/boyfriend saw the preview for a movie and talked about seeing it together and then they saw it with one of their friends while you were busy? Not really.

    743. How many people do you think will finish this whooooooole survey? Not many.

    744. Have you ever written a message, sealed it in a bottle and thrown it into a river/lake ocean? No.

    745. If you haven’t would you want to? Perhaps. I’ll think about it.

    746. If you ever did what would you write? I’ll think about it.

    747. What do you wish you could always be protected from? 5am.

    748. What small thing annoys you so much it should be a crime? People writing “loose” when they mean “lose”.

    749. Would you rather watch a video of fish in a tank, or the Yule log on TV? Sounds bad. Hopefully both will make me fall asleep.

    750. Is it better to be loved or feared? Loved.

  2. toto said,

    It’s good to see someone agree with me on some key issues :)

    oh, and you are right, the lyrics to Tuesday are very fine.

  3. Deirdre said,

    I’m seriously impressed by your commenting system – how long is Kent’s comment?? Fantastic.

    Plus this survey stuff is great. I hope you never post anything but this for ever more :)

  4. toto said,

    Thanks Dee.

    Kent’s comment is long. It required authorisation before it was displayed.

    I think I’ll be totally over this game once I hit that still distant end point. I’ll find something else to do

  5. nimeton said,

    pah. toto is not an essence.

    vanilla is however.

    bah

  6. toto said,

    well technically, no. Vanilla is not an essence it’s redgeg-didge vanilla. Vanilla essence (vanillin) is an essence but it’s the essence of vanilla not matty.

    from the wiki:
    “Natural vanilla is an extremely complicated mixture of several hundred different compounds, versus synthetic vanillin which is derived from phenol and is of high purity.” My grandpa (a retired chef) agrees. vanillin is good, but it really is just the essence.

  7. Kent said,

    And also not-so-technically no.

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